Ugly Spirited People

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Is Why - February 2008

The New Ugly Affluent World Citizen

February 17th 2008 02:33

The recent recipient(s) for the shared title of the New Ugly Affluent world citizens, you know who you nouveau riche are, were once only contenders for the title and have just recently assumed the mantle and scepter of the intolerant, nasty, mean and outright ugly; you newly Crowned Princes of mean are easily recognized by some or all of the following characteristics:

Have little foreign travel experience
Doesn’t bother to learn local customs, language, taboos, or even local currency
Hasn’t bothered to continue their education after High School
Hasn’t mastered the nuances of their native tongue, (Portuguese), (Spanglish), (Fang), (Alpha-Centurion)(N Korean) or (other)
Expects (Russian), (Tuvaluan), (Swahili), or (other) to be spoken universally
Has little understanding of their nation’s (Burundi), (Cuba), (Gabon), (Alpha-Centurions), (N Korean) or (pick a country) failings
Live restricted purposeless little lives free of an accurate moral compass
Narrow world view is as ridged as their spine
Has an inflated sense of self
Are nouveau riche from ill gotten gains
Has ingrained sense of Entitlement
Limited social interaction or skills
Has little tolerance of change
Displays their ephods of xenophobic bigotry as badges of honor
Cloak their hatred and discrimination under a cloak of religiosity
Usually over bearing
Rude
Demeaning
Flatulent
Devoid of modesty
Thoughtless
Overweight
Lazy
Demanding
Self serving
Entourage is a codeword for armed body guards
The world populace is there for their personal servitude
Have universal ‘rights’ due them
Judgmental, opinionated and mean spirited
Contemptuous of others
Intolerant of other views
Ambassadors of ignorance
Have a misogynistic or misandric persecution complex
Are unable to defend their personal beliefs intellectually

If any more than (9, 12 or 15) items offered above describe you, congratulations, you’re a candidate for an equal share in the New Ugly Affluent World Citizen order. May I be the first American to ceremoniously scuff your shoes in celebration of this monumental revelation?

Collectively, we Alaskan American’s are particularly moved and proud to be unyoked from the title of Ugly American, lately America has become to saturated with those other undocumented immigrants to qualify for the (un)prestigious title anymore and it was becoming an embarrassment. Americans and expat’s worldwide want to express their sincere appreciation for your actions and gladly surrender the scepter of Ugly Anything’s.

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Posted By: tlcorbin - Category: The Wood Shed

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